Inner World

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28/02/2024

A little something about worries and smilesThere are many layers to the World. The politics and its struggle between the service to others and the personal ambition. The wilderness and its fight for the right to live. The layer of economics and the layer where only beautiful poetry matters. The world of spirits that we feel and honour, and the world of science that helps us thrive for centuries. The world of stories and news from far away and the world of what we see with our own eyes. The heights of the sky that only the birds call their home and the depths of the ocean that no human ever saw. The darkest fear of the unknown and the purest love of a mother and her kids. The world we are told to understand and the world we observe ourselves when the mind stops talking. The single grain of sand in your palm and all the billions of galaxies in the observable universe…

One person with a good heart can hardly change the direction of the winds that blow too hard. And yet, he can be seen feeling ashamed by his own weakness when facing the beast far stronger than him. The history keeps piling up, the dunes keep moving, and we might feel small, with our efforts futile because the world we witness is not the one we dreamed of. The world we feel responsible for because unlike some others we have the right to vote, the right to speak, the right to make choices.

But just like we also have the right to be accepted for who we are and be respected for who we wish to be, so we are the most responsible to those close to us, our family, our friends and our neighbours. And it is that world, a seemingly smaller one but so rich and deep that it renders any numerical system laughable, it is that world that we have the power to change. Instantly. Every day, with every word, with every look and smile and gentle touch, in there we have all we need to make a lasting difference. Yet it is that world that we often forget to pay attention to and swap that power we have for gazing at the fire far beyond the horizon…

Two years ago, just when the world was slowly getting back to its productive self, something that most of us knew only from history books, movies and games became a reality again. It emerged to existence so close to where I spent my childhood that I wasn’t able to smile. For a week I lived as in shadow, argued for negligible reasons with those dearest to me and felt utterly hopeless – something I have honestly never experienced before. But then the first Monday afternoon came and my, still new at the time, friend Ruben came for the rehearsal, first before the others. “How are you?” I uttered, barely moving my lips as I opened the door for him. And the shiniest smile that his Mexican face could produce filled all the space around, suddenly reaching deeper in my soul than all the news. “AMAZING, MY BROTHER!!!!” He yelled as always… He either doesn’t read news, doesn’t give a damn or probably both. But the shadow was gone, as if it was just a smoke that my friend’s smile blew away. Is that worth nothing because it doesn’t stop the war? While the horrors are still out there and, even if indirectly, affect everyone, the love is always right here. Between two people who smile at each other. And how should one be strong enough to face the fear when he’s not armed with the love he needs?

I will remember that day forever. The moment I saw so clearly that there are different layers to our existence. That we can choose what to pay attention to, so we can bring beauty to this world even if it seems to be in flames. I saw that when I cannot change the worst thing out there, it’s not my duty to keep trying. Why to ask a rose to slay the dragon, when her real purpose is to grow in the park and make happy those who smell her fragrance?

Times are maybe harder than they were some years ago. And they might get harder still, who knows. But one can’t play the games of those he cannot reach. While right here is the space that each of us was given to exist in, to look after and to shape in the image of our good heart. The place where the sun still shines, trees whisper, songs are being played and strangers can be met with kindness. The world where a mom feeds her child every day and the snails need to be helped crossing the road when it gets wet. The world that matters to us and we matter to everything in that world. The layer of existence where a smile is stronger than shadows….

It’s just a good thing to find out one day, and a great thing to remember forever ❤

Big love,

Steppy

20/09/2021

PerKelt are not “political” in any way. We are a group of VERY strong personalities, often with very different views on the itchy questions of todays, but more than anything else we are a family. Friends, who care about each other as much or even more as we care about the outside world.

And we love each of you, the representatives of human kind, whether your opinion is left or right, up or down, this or that… We have more important and useful directions to aim our energy than to fighting. We listen, and when we think it’s worth it, we gently talk to share what we observe. And of course, we all learn every day.

The last few weeks were like a paradise for us. Performing, travelling, and sitting by a fire with new friends, discussing the beautiful and less beautiful parts of the world again. And we’ve confirmed for ourselves, yet again, the truth we always knew. That all of us have the power to take full responsibility for our life, and turn any situation into exactly what we want it to be. And if someone isn’t skilled in this mastery yet, please don’t blame the “government”, the “ignorants” the rich people, the “media”, people with different opinions or any other outside energy for dividing us and separating us from each other, as it’s all our own doing. There is only one kind of energy that matters, the energy we all have access to at any point, at any situation. The energy that provides guidance and solution to every problem, that creates the magical space where we all feel safe together, and that never gets depleted. The English language has a beautiful word for it: Love

…a partially unrelated, yet beautiful picture from the Sussex Faerie Festival

25/01/2021

It is tough…

I mean, we all try to do our best but it’s never pleasant to be limited in what we “are allowed to do”. Like children going through the usual upbringing…

And it’s long… Oh yeah, there are quite some similarities with childhood, it does remind me indeed the feeling of the young myself, thinking “When I turn adult, I’ll go out whenever I want, and buy all the chocolate I can carry!”

But then when I look back, in those never-ending years of (loving) imprisonment inside the perimeter of children’s room, I remember how good it was for me, too. Hiding under the blanket with a torch to read books after bed time, trying (and failing but trying again) to NOT eat all my limited supplies of chocolate in one go, having to put up with my brother’s very different taste of music, or exploring quite safely what happens if I just stop talking for few days…

In those years when I felt unfairly chained and was mostly reading, daydreaming, thinking and making some considerably useless stuff, I set the very foundation for my inner world, that I keep inside me still and could later share with everyone who listens to PerKelt songs. The peace of being alone with my thoughts. The beauty of stories read before sleep. The first lucid dreams where I can fly and do anything I want, without ever leaving my bed. And a lot more…

Yes, it felt SO GOOD to eventually throw myself in the vast outer world and surf the unpredictability of meeting new strangers every day. I had to wait for it for a long time but seeing what I learnt and created in the meantime, for the future “unleashed” me, I am really grateful I did. However difficult and deeply unfair it felt at the time…

So now, I am staying up till late, enjoying stories before sleep, dreaming, listening to the music of my housemates, and making (sometimes considerably useless:)) stuff for the future me. And though I have to wait to “be allowed” to unleash my full potential again, I know that I CAN wait. And that later I will most certainly see again how good this waiting was for me…

Also, it’s my birthday today! I got new slippers and t-shirt with Deadpool! 🙂

Take care you all <3

Big LOVE

-Steppy

***

12/10/2020

PerKelt is still on an enforced sabbatical, there are beautiful things being created behind the curtains but no live gigs mean I have time (and after finishing one massive collaboration project finally some mind space) for expressing some thoughts.

I know it’s getting long, and actual lives of vulnerable friends are put in danger. I am totally up for helping to protect them and very proud of the humankind that empathy wins big time and in general we all somehow comply with this strategy. But what makes me feeling very sad (and before the pandemic it was Brexit, before that it was the refugee crisis and the list goes on) is how people of different opinions can’t talk with each other anymore. Friendships are being broken, families split apart, those with a different opinion cast away as ‘dangerous’ and fear is winning over love. THAT I am very much not proud of and it often makes me escape the “social media” level of existence, though otherwise it is an incredible tool…

I am a gamer. And many of the lessons for the ‘practical life’ I’ve learnt from my favourite board games and card games. That losing in a duel doesn’t mean the end of the world. That when it all looks hopeless I need to stop panicking and revisit all the options before making another move. That all the decisions are made by calculating/estimating the probabilities and finding the right priorities. And that the worst thing that can happen, no matter who wins or loses, is that two friends would leave the gaming table angry with each other. These simple discoveries became an integral part of my life and at one point I finally understood what my very good friend meant when he said that ‘life is a game’.

Over the years I practiced putting these lessons into practice. Counting how probable it is that something of mine gets stolen or damaged and if it’s worth to stop trusting others. Stopping every thought and just breath when I notice that panic is taking over. Trusting myself that I can easily deal with losing even the biggest game. And probably the most important one: Prioritising love and friendship over the fearful urge to always win.

So you can see how saddened I can get when two people I love (and I happen to love probably everybody:)) start calling each other ugly names, mocking each other’s point of view, burning bridges and sometimes even pulling me into this craziness and asking me to join one of the war sides. I just want to sit and listen to what you see. Maybe ask questions when I am not sure I understand. And even if we still disagree at the end, I want to make sure that we hug and smile, looking forward to seeing each other again. Because even if the world turns into ashes (and I can tell you, it is HIGHLY IMPROBABLE it ever will:)) the only time we really lose everything is when a brother turns against his sister.

With big love to the family of humans ❤

Steppy, PerKelt

(pic by Cliff de Booy, CastleFest 2018)

***

04/04/2020

We were a bit silent recently for few reasons…

Slaughtered Lamb Friday 13th

a) All the gigs are getting obviously cancelled, and knowing how much we were looking forward to them (and working as hell to make them a completely next level experience for everyone) it was a bit harder than usual to find the right words…

b) Every day, there was so much being said about the current situation already, that there wasn’t much to add.

c) The obvious way out of problems like this is to start working hard 🙂 So we made ourselves REALLY busy with recording and writing new music for you.

But… As we are gradually adapting to the new order of things, words are slowly coming back to my mind and want to be shared. So just briefly:

However we can often bring a fresh point of view,I don’t think it’s the job of a musician to tell their audience what to do, to claim that we know the way out of troubles… We are not scientists or world leaders. We simply can’t know any better than you.

It is, however, the job of a musician to give their audience the strength to deal with anything the world throws at them. Yes, music can do that… I remember very well myself, in the times of the biggest need, when even friends couldn’t help, when my scattered mind would play tricks on me, and anxieties were leaving me only when depressions were stronger than them. When the mind was so unstable even meditations wouldn’t be possible. It was listening to the music of my favourite band that gave me the solid ground under my feet. That made me fly again and gave me the peaceful space I needed so much.

To be able to create this kind of music, the music that shows the listener where is their strength to love, strength to open their heart again, strength to laugh and dance no matter what situation the world (or your life) is currently in… for that the musician himself needs to be strong like a lion, with a soft heart of a dove. (a quote of my guitar teacher from 12 years ago)

I love the fact that the five members of PerKelt are exactly that kind of people. When all the gigs are getting cancelled (and frankly, unless some miracle happens soon they will keep getting cancelled for quite some time), instead of mourning, crying and complaining, we started immediately thinking what to do next. Yeah, that’s what made us, the humankind, such a dominant animals after all – the skill to always find the way, to adapt to the new situation and get the best out of it. To imagine a way… and then put our hands together in creating this a new reality.

So… that’s what we are doing, currently. Very soon, after all the preparations are finished, we will share with you our plans for the nowadays very transformed future. We are all actually REALLY excited!!! 🙂

In the short meantime, please, take care. And if you find yourself feeling low, listen to music that gives you strength.

We love you ❤

Steppy,

PerKelt

(The picture is from our last gig for some time, Friday the 13th at The Slaughtered Lamb, taken by Peter Males, thank you! You were such a great audience… We can’t wait to be allowed to play at least smaller shows again…)

***

13/12/2019

In the UK we woke up into quite a challenging morning… It is the nature of an artist to care about the World. And politics, however oftentimes appalling, is an inseparable part of the big picture of that big World we all live in. Affecting each of us whether we want or not. Not just by the decisions these chosen people make in the big global game, but even more importantly by their presence in media, with their words and their intentions… the spells they cast, amplified through TV, newspapers and money. That affects all of us nearly every day… There was a glimmer of hope that one of the richest and most powerful countries on this planet would choose a new direction, different to the others, a direction where love, truth, moral and empathy will be the new set of the highlighted values… Sadly, not today. Just like in so many other countries in the last several years, the lies, money and selfishness won another battle last night. Another loss for those who care about truth, kindness and the wellbeing of others, one might feel…

Fantasy Forest 2019 (pic by Steppy)

But…

The real battle isn’t any kind of a war between the people… we all are in this together. And we all are so much more than just “people”. We are the LIFE. We are the wind, we want to be the hot air that lifts the spirit up like a feather, before the cold air could bring it back to the ground. We want to see the feather dancing up in the sky, we want to keep the fire burning and let more of these loving and caring fires being lit and growing, so the feather can keep dancing in the hot air, far and high.

With all the beautiful open hearts, make sure to keep the fire burning. Do not learn from those currently in power to fall for the easy way of lies and cowardice but face the truth bravely. Do not learn to prefer the personal profit if it could mean one causes harm to another. Do not stop seeking the truth…

As a very wise person once wrote: “Hope is not the conviction that something will turn out well but the certainty that something makes sense, regardless of how it turns out.”

So most importantly, do not despair if you see the feather dropped on the ground because the air was too cold. do not give up but smile and dance to keep the fire burning…

We love you ❤